The black fly report

Greetings one and all! First, I want to thank you all for participating in ‘Operation Feast On a Fat Guy’ Over 372,000 black flies from the greater Newport area participated, and in the end close to 600,000 were able to take part in the all you can eat buffet when we captured an unprotected man who was out doing some yard work.

Things got a little hairy there for a minute, when the guy’s wife chucked him a can of D.E.E.T. before we cleared the dooryard, but luckily for us, the can was empty!

Since this was such a success, plans on a second capture are already in the works. If you missed out the last time, be sure to contact your local coordinator.

Now on to less happy news. Last winter’s low snow cover, and frequent thaws have left normally fast-moving streams, slow and sluggish this season, and sadly hatchery numbers are low.

The good news in that, is that the late season cold snaps prior to our emergence have caught early season mosquitoes by surprise, and wiped out a good deal of them, thus reducing competition.

The cold snap has also reduced the number of predatory frogs as well. Many of you early hatchers will recall that the nights have been relatively frogless. However yesterday’s mild weather, combined with the warm showers over night that are expected to last most of the day today, means that the frogs are once again coming up out of the mud. So, if you are attacking a fisherman, be wary of frogs lurking in the weeds at his feet. Be mindful of our slogan: “Why fly low for the meat near the feet? When you can fly high and aim for the eye!” and you can avoid any encounter with frogs.

Our next report will update you on the night-time menace, BATS! And some information on the ever dangerous dragonfly.

That’s all for the time being, but remember, D.E.E.T. not only tastes bad, but it kills! So avoid any human this time of year that has a greasy sheen on their bare skin, and has a strange odor.

Doug Alley

About Doug Alley

I grew up in Bath, Maine in an upper lower class family with 3 step sisters, a step brother, and a little sister. After high school I spent 3 years serving in the USAF at Elmendorf AFB in Anchorage AK. I've competed in, and won, demolition derbies. I've competed in, and never won, stock car races. I am the 47-year-old father of an 11-year-old boy who is pretty sure he is smarter than I ever was. We live on a little less than an acre of land in a 1973 mobile home in Stetson with my wife Jen, some cats, a few chickens, and rabbits, and a couple of goats. I hunt, fish, camp out, dabble in photography, gardening, and I cook in variable degrees of near success.